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Monday, March 25, 2013
Why Alpha Males Seduce Women Easier Than Non-Alpha Males
Some guys question the idea that alpha males have an easier time seducing women than non-alpha males and I guess I understand where that skepticism comes from. Just coming from a logical viewpoint, it might not make a lot of sense as to why it would be so much easier for an alpha male to be able to seduce a woman, but it is something that you are going to see a lot of evidence of, if you get down in the trenches and see what happens in the bars and the clubs. It's not the guys who make great partners from a logical point of view that end up attracting the attention of women, it's the guys who have that natural alpha male vibe.
Here are some reasons why it goes down like that:
1. Alpha males don't wait for a woman to come to them, they go and approach her.
In a dream world, it might be nice to imagine that being the guy, women would be the ones to approach you. Now, that does happen to some guys every now and again. However, those are almost always still the alpha males. The reality is that if you want to be able to get women into bed, you can't wait for them to come to you. You'll be waiting a LONG time in most cases. And if you don't give off the impression that you really are an alpha male, chances are it will never come.
2. They don't bring the party down, they make it livelier.
What a lot of men don't realize is that when they go to approach a woman with horrible energy and equally horrible body language, they bring down the party. They are a drag. Guys who are alpha males don't do that. They make things more fun, they make them livelier and women like that. Women like to go out and come across a guy who is going to make their night more fun and more enjoyable. And the more enjoyable and fun that you make the night for her, the more likely it is that she is going to want to end the night with you.
3. They don't fear escalation, they embrace it.
If you are the kind of guy who is a little fearful of having to take things to that next level with a woman, that is something that has to change like right now. You can't expect the woman to put the moves on you, you have to be able to put the moves on her. Alpha males are leaders and they know how to lead a woman into seduction and that is the thing that you have to be able to do. You can't fear escalation, you have to want to escalate and enjoy the process.
Are you ready to learn the way of the alpha male so that you can seduce women easily?
Go to: Seduction Advice for Men to find out how you can make that happen.
Copyright (c) 2013 Chris G Tyler. All Rights Reserved.
Thursday, August 30, 2012
Living in the House of Yes
I grew up hearing "NO" a lot. As much as I rebelled against the ideas that I can't have what I want, that deprivation is somehow noble, and that I certainly can't have it all, I internalized those ideas and lived them out for years and years.
Yet a part of me always knew it wasn't true. I think our true self wants to do it all, to be free, to explore and expand and its sane voice gets buried under all of these false ideas we learn from our parents and people around us who are in their own story about deprivation.
I remember my former girlfriend consciously beginning to say "Yes" to herself because she had learned and heard that "NO" so much in her upbringing. She began having as many beverages as she wanted at dinner. She took herself shopping and splurged. She began looking for all of the ways she could say "Yes" to herself and give herself what her parents had not given or been able to give her. It brought a spirit of abundance to her life in small and bigger ways, and by association, to mine.
Yet a part of me rebelled, even then. I thought she was overindulgent. It was unnecessary. I wasn't ready to say "Yes" like that yet. I was still in my old story.
Then I got to the place where I was done with that big bold NO. I decided I wasn't going to be deprived anymore of the love, sex, money, successes and life experiences I had kept away. Why keep doing that? It wasn't noble. It was miserable.
That deprivation rolls over into so many areas of your life. How you hold back and keep yourself in a state of starvation in your love relationships, in your daily living, in your work, in your creativity. It becomes a "treat" to do something you WANT to do. You tell yourself "I deserve it" as if you have to do something to earn it. But it's already yours. You just need to declare it and accept it. The universe is an abundant place. It doesn't set out to make you feel deprived.
This isn't to say every "yes" is a healthy "yes". You can overdo food, alcohol, drug use, the gym, socializing, technology, distractions. Sometimes you need to keep it simple. Stay home and connect to yourself. Manage your weight well. Not succumb to the addictions that plague you. Boundaries are important. And yet healthy boundaries can be set while not dropping down into the pits of deprivation that make you want hard and feel like you are suffering.
If you grew up in a family where there was a state of deprivation, there is no way you don't take on that deprivation story one way or another. It really plagues you when you keep people's love away and block yourself from having the closeness and kindness you really want to be able to give yourself. No one else will really be able to give it to you as long as you are bargaining with your own demons about having or not having.
Many of us did not grow up in the "House of Yes". I choose to live in that house as much as possible now. If you've ever done improv, you know the one rule is that when an offer is made, the answer is always "yes". "Yes, and... " No "buts". No blocking. Accepting, embracing.
What would it mean to start saying "Yes" to yourself and to the offers that are made to you? How could you live a fully expressed and experienced life in the "House of Yes" and possibility? How could you begin to truly embrace abundance and expansion in your life, relationships and sexuality? In your checking account? In your health? Where in your life do you need to start living in your "yes"?
Please comment and let us know on my blog!
Amy Jo Goddard thrives on helping people develop sexually empowered lives, deeper intimate relationships, more abundance and more pleasurable sex. A sexuality educator, trainer, author, performing artist and activist, she travels to colleges, universities, communities and conferences teaching workshops and speaking about sexuality. She has taught workshops at such schools as Barnard College, Princeton University, Vassar College, NYU, & Gallaudet University. A professional trainer of sexuality professionals, medical students, college students and youth for fifteen years, she has taught courses at the City University of New York and the University of California at Santa Barbara. Amy Jo is co-author of Lesbian Sex Secrets for Men and contributing Author of All About Sex, among other writings. She has worked in various women's and queer communities as an activist and advocate. Amy Jo maintains a private sex coaching practice and facilitates her six month sexuality program for women, The Sexually Empowered Life, in New York City. She can be found online at http://www.amyjogoddard.com/ and https://www.facebook.com/pages/Amy-Jo-Goddard/348841508485024